Another setback.

I've been a bad blogger.


It's been a few days since my follow-up appointment with my surgeon, and I just haven't had the heart to come here and diary what happened.

Well, I'll start with all of the good news first, because there *was* a lot of it, so I should focus on that.

My cyst shelled out nicely during the surgery, and the pathology results stated it was a benign fibroadenoma. Thank goodness. During the surgery, my surgeon also assessed my peritoneum (normal), liver (nice and smooth and free of lesions), ovaries (both mobile, corpus luteum on my right side), fallopian tubes (patent) and uterus (normal). Other than that darn cyst, there wasn't anything to worry about.

Sigh.

Then she said that I need another hysteroscopy done before I'll be allowed to cycle for my IVF/PGD. I was so surprised, I forgot to ask her why. She got busy checking the booking schedule to see if I could come in for this cycle - nope, fully booked. Ok, no problemo I thought. Next cycle it is.

Nope!

Closed for Christmas.

Ah MAN! Nuts. Nuts! So, she said it wouldn't be until the New Year. Grr!

So - scope is done between day 8 & 12 (? I think? ) of your cycle... my math puts that at either having the scope the first week of January or, more likely, the first week of February. FUCK!

She also ran some bloodwork - my FSH, Prolactin and TSH are all in normal range, but my E2 was a little high I think - 362 on day 5. Hoping that this is nothing to worry about, because I don't need another freakin' setback right now.

Anyway. *Hopefully* December 13 will truly be my protocol appointment with my RE, and he won't shoo me out the door again until after the stupid hysteroscope. I think if he does that, he'll have a hysterical patient on his hands.

So there it is - we've been bumped, AGAIN.

We've been with this clinic since February of 2010. We first saw the clinic prior to this one in the summer of 2009. We've had this diagnosis since September 2009 - why the hell is it so hard to align the stars just right so that I can at least start to *think* about cycling? I hate this fucking waiting game. I'm so sick of it.

And, I'm sick of people telling me that all of this is happening for a reason. Really? You really think so? Because I think that that is a bullshit line people tell themselves in order to make themselves feel better.

I'm a straight shooter. I don't mess around. Don't sugar coat it.

I'm impatient (I'm the first one to admit this). In the first year when we were waiting for all of the testing and appointments and counselling I thought, well, this is God/Universe/Whatever testing us and teaching us patience - a trait that is so important when you're a parent (or so they tell me).

Now? Pft. I think it's bull. Total, and utter bull. We have bad luck. Plain and simple.