Imagine, ladies, if we were around 60 some odd years ago, and had a little extra cash floating around. I tells ya, there are two things I would have invested in: feminine hygiene and Coc.a Col.a.
As per most clinic's usual post-IVF protocol, I'm on "luteal phase support".
Fancy-shmancy talk for 'I have to shove a massive tablet up my who-ha every 12 hours'.
Ah, yes. The mess that is the progesterone suppository. Now - I have to say - I'm on the 'effervescent tablet' form of the stuff, which, again, is fancy-shmancy talk for 'as soon as I, the tablet, hit any sort of moisture I dissolve into pastey-goodness which makes a lovely mess in your panties'. That said - there are some ladies that have to be on this oily-capsuley form of the crap which I'm SURE would be WAY worse mess-wise.
(I especially enjoy the website from the latter mentioned form of vaginal torture; it makes me laugh to see all of these women with happy faces encompassed by blankets of 'prometrium'. Too funny.) I digress.
The lovely thing about these tablets I'm on is that they come with their own applicators. How nice of them to think of this! [insert sarcasm here]. Gross. But at least I don't have to, uh, stick my fingies where the sun doesn't shine...
So anyway, you've got to give yourself (really, your vaj-jay-jay) the medication every 12 hours. No problem. Side effects include vaginal dryness (nice), constipation (next post), breast tenderness (YOUCH!) and drowsiness (check!).
Where do the pantiliners come in? Oh, my friend, I'll tell you.
About 4-6 hours after I've inserted said 'effervescent tablet' (I like that word), I get leaking. Mass, think-you-got-your-period leaking.
You know that 'holy shit' gush that you get when you stand up after a long time lying or sitting? Ya. Imagine that. Daily. For a few hours at a time - until all the 'effervescent-ness' is gone and then guess what? It's time to insert another suppository.
So ya. I'm lovin' pantiliners right now.
Posts
4 comments on "3dp5dET ... (8DPO) ... Progesterone."
I love your sarcasm. I can completely see where those pantyliners come in handy. I wear them all th time because I always have some sort of 'stuff' coming out now-a-days.
I wish I was able to have the suppositories though...I get the crappy shots that will continue after I am pregnant.
I'm am glad you are making light of all the crap we go through though. That's all you can do sometimes.
MissC
Oh, you make me smile. I had adult onset diaper rash for the first three months of my pregnancy thanks to the oily, non-applicator version of this loveliness. Oh, and on that note, I have NO idea how people use tampons with no applicator!
I agree with MissC though, sometimes you just have no choice but to laugh.
LMAO!!! Love it!!
You have it better than I do! No applicators... just fingers... and have to do 2 pills - 3 times a day!!! WOWSA!
Ugh... that sounds so pleasant - and yet you manage to make it funny at the same time! I love your ability to look at the yucky stuff with a sense of humor.
But honestly, the things we put ourselves through! I have yet to experience the effervescent or oily loveliness you describe, and I think it's kind of bizarre that I am actually hoping for it one day!
Post a Comment